Monday, June 19, 2006

How Gopal Mehta Got Paid, Almost Got Laid, and Got Trained


Gopal Metha was a Princeton student not unlike other Princeton students. He loved blue pants, girls in frocks, waxing philosophical, and most of all, elitist institutions.

To elucidate, after Gopal’s college application process, he had gotten into every top school in the US, but his decision making process was quite simple. He knew he could never go to Wharton for fear of association with the Nittany Lions, Stanford was too jock-y and Bay Area hippie, and the only thing prestigious about New Haven was its gangs (Tre Douce!). Harvard and MIT did have lower acceptance rates (good sign), but they had significantly higher Asian-American student percentages (17% and 28% vs. Princeton’s 13%). Gopal found the acceptance into the Old Boy’s Club far more elite and eagerly matriculated at Princeton.

Gopal loved it at the top where the air was crisp. But unfortunately for Gopal, the air’s crispness is relative. At Princeton, he was systematically refused entrance into any secret society, comedy troupe, dance group, vegetarian co-op, bible study or anything even remotely selective. He incessantly bickered the University’s eating clubs, but eventually had to resort to the painfully common “sign-in” process.

And so Gopal was ordinary for three years. Everyday, he looked in the mirror and sulked. He couldn’t stand not having a group of random people reinforcing his dwindling self worth. He needed to feel like he was among a select few, and most importantly, he needed to be able to make fun of people that couldn’t enter his circle. The unfortunate fact was that Gopal was the person getting made fun of.

But this all changed Gopal’s first semester senior year. After weeks of grueling Vault book and message board reading and interviewing, Gopal was offered a job as an investment banking analyst in the Consumer Products Consumer/Retail group at Goldman Sachs. At last, the fox was in the henhouse. He had put himself out on the line, taken a huge risk, and it had paid off. He had gotten the job that every single Princeton student dreamed about but could never get. He was, once again, special. Goldman Sachs had faxed over their congratulations. It said “Welcome to the club.” Elated with his rediscovered prestige, he went home and set the following away message:


I am so elite that my collars pop themselves. Even when I try to fold them down (like at a funeral or a day of national tragedy) it just won’t work.


He thought that showed class.

When Gopal started training early that summer, he knew that he would do anything to ensure that he was not the prole, friendless loser he was at Princeton. He would be cool. And since he was instructed that training for bankers didn’t really mean anything at all, he decided his best angle was to be the drunken, boisterous fool that everyone loves to hang out with. He’d be even more loud and more boisterous than the kids from Australia and more irreverent than the Japanese. Fuck winning the hearts of the back row, Gopal would be the entire back row himself.

He started out by taking his name tag on the first day and writing “Fun Guy” next to his name in big red letters. This was an excellent ice breaker. Within 30 minutes everyone knew him, remembered him, and couldn’t wait to drink with him at the first social event.

And on cue, at an event a few nights later, Gopal went to the bar and ordered four mixed drinks and a couple of beers. The entire stock was for him. He figured, if the price of inebriation was warm drinks with melted ice, so be it. Gopal got sloshed quickly, danced double-fisted, told jokes he’d read on the Internet, and flirted openly with older female bankers. He was the center of attention, in a good way, and the surge of acceptance flowed through his veins for the first time in years. What bliss.

Soon however, the bliss turned into a heaviness settling in down below the belt. Maybe it was just that after twenty two years he was sick and tired of having to relieve himself the way everybody else did. In a toilet, that is. Gopal began to contemplate alternative options to trudging to the bathroom for a quick draining of the plumbing. Luckily, the table was covered with a white linen tablecloth whose edges hung halfway to the floor, and he had just finished a bottle of beer—a fitting receptacle for his golden gift. Gopal sidled up closer to the table, slipped the empty beer bottle down below, covered his lap with the tablecloth, and relaxed…

Gopal went uncaught and got up and walked around the party some more, schmoozing like a pro, basking in everyone’s love for him. Then, he spotted a thin little Indian girl standing in the corner with a friend and his mother’s cries for a daughter-in-law that she could verbally abuse in her mother tongue took over: a marriage candidate? So Gopal went over and began chatting with her (name: Sheetal). As drunk as Gopal was, they hit it off famously; they clicked. Gopal told stories about how everyone called him “Gay Pal” growing up and Sheetal confessed she cried herself to sleep every night because even her teachers pronounced her name “Shit All.” It seemed like all the astrological signs were in place. Everything was on track for Gopal and Sheetal to dance coyly around trees, make out, clash teeth from inexperience, and call their parents to elate them with the news that a nice Brown mate had been found.

Then Gopal went to the bar to get them two drinks. And en route, he spotted a tall, blond, Aryan goddess. Everything about her screamed: Mayflower, Spence, and “My only entertainment in life is destroying the self-confidence of boys that try to hit on me,” and Gopal was captivated. Sheetal was far gone from his mind, White girls were a far more elite catch.

The girl was talking casually with similarly endowed boys and girls, and they all looked far less uncomfortable than everyone else. Naturally so, they’d been living this scene since they were 5 years old.

Anyway, Gopal was on top of the world and drunk and figured he could win over anyone at the party. Getting drunk was the universal cool. So he went up to the she-pedigree and said:

“Did you invite all these people? I thought it was just going to be the two of us?”

The girl and her posh-posse all stopped talking for a brief moment, taken aback. And then, as if they’d been trained to mock immigrant children from birth, they, in unison, burst out in laughter. Gopal was mortified.

One of them cruelly mimed Gopal in a high-pitched voice. Someone else shouted, “Woah there Fun Guy!” as if scolding an overheated poodle. And worst of all, the girl in question asked him, perfectly seriously, “Equities in Dallas?”

And it was a quick and hard fall from glory for Gopal. This was a trainee-wide event, and the absolute worst position any trainee in any division could imagine was being slotted in Equities in Dallas. No one could imagine anything less successful in their small world than an equity salesman in Dallas; the equity department was powerless, and Dallas was, well, a long way from New York.

The comment pierced through to Gopal’s core. All the rejections he’d felt at Princeton came rushing back at him. He felt like a dead rat being hosed off the curb by a deli owner.

He folded. He scurried away from his mockers, grabbed a bottle of Beam from the bar and ran. He escaped back to his parent-subsidized (for the time being) Murray Hill studio, and drank and cried himself to sleep.

The next morning, Gopal showed up at training, stumbling drunk, eyes still bloodshot, smelling like a speak-easy. He name card no longer read “Fun Guy.” He was just Gopal Mehta. He was no longer elite or cool. He was just another douchebag.


81 comments for this post.

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  1. +2 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    nice reference to Liar?s Poker?and to the borrowed passages of the harvard student author?funny stuff.

  2. -1 votes + -
    Milton Friedman Said:

    yep, good stuff and welcome back. but what?s with this corporate finance skew, we need more stories of Sales&Trading ”analysts”. remember, your bible is a book about Front Office people in dealing rooms, not white shoes doing ”modeling” in cubicles. Plus we get free weekends

  3. +2 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    And monkey business as well

  4. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Hm, yeah. A bit of both Liar?s Poker and Monkey Business there. The best blogs have had two things. 1. Their own credible details of insecure IB behaviour. 2. Irony that only some of the readers understand. This means that the people who don?t get the irony start comment identify themselves as complete losers by commenting on the details.

  5. -1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    nice monkey business reference too. what?s the harvard student author passage?

  6. 0 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Dude, coming from another guy ivy-league brown guy in banking, you hit it right on the head. Especially, chasing the holy grail aka the UES blonde. Keep up the good writing, its like your talking about my life haha.

  7. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    spence? last time i checked mayflower was associated with boston brahmin bluebloods and not new york transplant jokers. i would have used milton, groton or exeter.

  8. -1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Keep it coming. Ditto – nice job on the MB and LP references. Only neg is that since your story is relatively short and having read the books, I could see the references coming from miles away.

  9. +2 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Good material as always – as a fellow dot, you?ve nailed our appetite for the Scandinavians on the head.

  10. -1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    no love for andover?

  11. +3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    andover is in to the whole yale thing. (see american psycho quotes for explanation)

  12. 0 votes + -
    Ankur Said:

    Haha, great post, like the reference to Liar?s Poker. Keep them coming.

  13. +3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    As a brown banker who has scored a few UES blondes, all I can say is that they are not all they are cracked up to be ? massive drug problems, self esteem issues, and let?s not even talk abt the STDs.

  14. +3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    The plagerism spoof was decent, but the ”clash teeth from inexperience” comment left my sides hurting.

  15. +2 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    a daughter in law to abuse in her mother tongue? CLASSIC

  16. -1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    story made my day

  17. -1 votes + -
    global gunslinger Said:

    Good stuff- keep up the good work. As I look at the ”Sheetal” sitting next to me, I can only dream about the WASPy godess I?ll meet at sutton place come thursday (if I ever get out of the office)?

  18. -7 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    laywers > bankers hth.

  19. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Hed be even more loud and more boisterous than the kids from Australia and more irreverent than the Japanese. Unreal! But honestly, Andover sucks, St. Albans is the only school left with seators sons and golden parachutes as standard uniform. Al Gore?s son got kicked out for a reason.

  20. -6 votes + -
    Mike Church Said:

    After weeks of grueling Vault book and message board reading and interviewing, Gopal was offered a job as an investment banking analyst in the Consumer Products group at Goldman Sachs. At last, the fox was in the henhouse. He had put himself out on the line, taken a huge risk, and it had paid off. He had gotten the job that every single Princeton student dreamed about but could never get. Eh, wrong. Any student at a T25 undergrad can easily get an IB position, except in shit years like 2002-2003 when it actually becomes slightly difficult. There are several Princeton students at top math, comp-sci, econ and physics departments. I know a few of them. Grad school in these subjects (at the level of the top 25-50 departments, at least) is several hundred times more selective than investment banking. This is not to disparage investment banking: it?s a respectable career choice. However, at the out-of-college level, it?s not remotely selective. The ”analyst” division is unselective sweat-shop labor, that?s all. Surviving an analyst stint at least says something. Play again when you?re ready, kiddo.

  21. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Well said bulldog, only a STAlbans man would pick up on the referance to Tucker Max.com.

  22. +2 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    It?s true to a degree, Andover is well removed from the old boys club thing, and has been for quite some time. Too liberal I suppose. Still plenty of offspring of the rich and famous when I matriculated though.

  23. +2 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    No way man ? getting a job at a top IB is so much harder. I take it you?re an academic loser who wishes he/she was a banker and didn?t get the job ? LOSER. play again when you actually know your stuff man. ANALYSTS ROCK!!

  24. +3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Whats the matter with Mike Church ”Eh, wrong. Any student at a T25 undergrad can easily get an IB position, except in shit years like 2002-2003 when it actually becomes slightly difficult. Play again when you?re ready, kiddo. ” you definitely are one of those grad school souped up academics who study all their lives trying to get the job of their dreams, but end up becoming disgruntled professors at a shitty state school.. Analysts do rock!!!!!!

  25. +3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Thanks a lot for bidding up the UES blondes by being desperate. Time to long brunettes and short blondes courtesy M&A/IB fools. -BSD Trader

  26. +3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    It?s Patrick Bateman gone diverse. Very 2005. I thought we?d tired of that whole social climbing thing in 1998.

  27. +7 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    mike church – here is this guy who writes leveraged sellout for all of us to enjoy, and consistently delivers grade A material. Then you come around, analyzing the details with your sarcastic comments, attempting to impress us with your knowledge of matters no one cares about. I say kudos to the leveraged sellout, and to guys like you: if you don?t have anything nice to say?well?shut up.

  28. +3 votes + -
    Another Club Member Said:

    Yeah, the LP & MB references were great, though obvious to anyone who?s read them. In other words, everybody. I was thrilled to see a very underappreciated quote from Boiler Room stuck in there. I want you all to know that those pikers at the NASD are finally off our ass. JT Marlin once again has unlimited trading authorization. I told you guys, you can?t keep a good man down. We are the superstars now. JP Morgan just faxed over their congratulations. It said, ”Welcome to the Club.”

  29. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Pretty lame that I caught this, but the ”at the top where the air is crisp” is from The Girl Next Door.

  30. +3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Besharam Kuta!

  31. +1 votes + -
    Ajay Said:

    so good.

  32. +10 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    As a PE rockstar, I agree with BSD trader and believe that brunettes are currently undervalued, therefore going at bargain basement prices. The key is to find one of these women, buy some peroxide, turn ?em blonde, rachet up their value, while contractually holding them by your side, and then setting them free 12-15 years from now. At that point you can take your amassed social wealth and procure a younger, naturally blonde, version of what you gave up. It?s a win/win. Wait until that girl at the bar gets wrinkles and is dropped by her hubby and desperately seeking Gopal.

  33. -1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Yeah, ok PE Rockstar. You could follow your devious little outlined plan, or just have game and get the real blonde now. I prefer the later.

  34. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    so you?d rather go after something that is completely overvalued, pay way too much and not see any growth in your investment? well, I think we just found the winner of the auction. based on your comment two things are obvious: 1. clearly you don?t work at a hedge fund or a PE firm. 2. you lack the ability to understand wit/humor ? i don?t think they offer that at community college, so I don?t blame you.

  35. -1 votes + -
    Brunette Said:

    You might have to rethink your long brunette strategy?we?re far too good for you lot.

  36. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    very good, maybe your best so far

  37. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    I think we all know one or two Gopal Mehtas!

  38. +1 votes + -
    Mr. Chalk Said:

    i back the long brunette strategy. tall blondes invariably end up threatening suicide. now if you mix a little ”big ass” in there, now then you hit the jackpot

  39. 0 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Based on a true story?

  40. 0 votes + -
    Mortimer G. Thornock, III Said:

    The Bankers on Mars article spoiled me. Now if I don?t see ”This is how we do it on Broad and Wall” then I can?t laugh.

  41. +2 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Gopal would probably say, ”This is how we do Broads on Wall!!!”

  42. -3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    the ?Equities in Dallas? bit is hardly a Liar?s P reference?more of a crappy attempt to pass off the idea even though your audience is clearly familiar. Why explain it here? Takes the fun out of it for the initiated (anyone with an asshole and eyes) and lets people who aren?t familiar (not sure who reads Lev Sellout and hasn?t read L?s Poker) enjoy fully. ?Equities in Dallas? is more than a sufficient. Anyone who doesn?t understand can eat balls or find a dog-eared copy of the book and learn for themselves. Thanks for ruining the fun by inviting all the proles from mid-level state school in on the joke. Lame.

  43. +2 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    its Consumer/Retail, not Consumer Products

  44. 0 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    hey genius PE Rockstar – you?re dumb, show me a hot actress in Hollywood right now who isn?t brunette – blonde is old, even natural blondes have gone brunette and Mike Church – I?m a banker and a former doctor – you don?t know what you?re talking about – if it?s so selective to get an advanced science degree that leads to um?oh yeah years of indentured servitude as a post-doc and a rat race to publish for prestige sake?why is it that applications across the board to advanced science degree granding graduate programs are down – including med schools? Oh yeah that?s right, because it doesn?t pay and it?s not selective – if you want to get a PhD with your MD, all of a sudden med school is free – hmm?sounds real competitive

  45. -1 votes + -
    Bitter Banker Said:

    Your ”Tre Douce!” reference belies your Yalie / Southern CT roots. In any event, you gets mad props from your former gangsta turned IB sell-out brethren.

  46. +2 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    You guys should get back to your models. Way too many people loafing around?fuck what the hell am I doing here? ahhhh?same shit!!!

  47. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    > more irreverent than the Japanese. sooooo true!!!! Great article!!!

  48. -6 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    This is the WORST post I?ve seen on this site. Its a rip off and poorly written. Also, stop being jealous of Indians? its not their fault there so fucking smart.

  49. -2 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    It is not their fault they are* so f-ing smart, and it is not your fault you are* not.

  50. -1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Booyakasha.

  51. +3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Boiler Room quote doesn?t get enough respect?.I was dying.

  52. -3 votes + -
    anonymous Said:

    is that upenn/pennstate reference supposed to be a joke? you do realize that the nittany lions are at pennstate, right? btw i?m not from around those parts of the world but what?s the stigma attached to having studied in penn state?

  53. -3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    its any state school(and all schools except harvard, princeton, and yale), you simple prole. do not come back to this site again.

  54. +2 votes + -
    buckeye Said:

    my football team is better than yours, you late bloomer

  55. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    my paycheck can buy and sell your football team and all of its players.

  56. -3 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Stop posting comments until you own your own business and PE firms won?t leave you alone

  57. -7 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Great story? in regards to the comparison to GRAD SCHOOL and IB-Jobs, they are both comparable to being a slave for a master? GRAD STUDENTS: You spend about 4 – 6 years studying something for meaningless stipends and at the end of the day you take a job at a research institute or company doing research? that?s crap unless off course you have a true passion for it. I-Bankers: Though you make more money if that money is divided by the amount of hours you work you are underpaid at about 6 bucks/hr? people who work at McDonalds make the same? yeah I know you can argue about end year bonuses and the like but they are heavily taxed and insignificant unless u r an MD. Advice try finding your own brand and you can be like me for the rest of your lives I am 28 and I live in the Riviera in Italy? money works for me? I give a couple of advice on Microsoft Exchange every now and then and that?s it. The Point: DO NOT ESTIMATE THE POWER OF TECHNOLOGY

  58. +2 votes + -
    astralgirl01 Said:

    Good graces? for all of the self-lauding tripe I?ve read in this Comment section, I?m baffled that some of you twats couldn?t take a second to spell-check your posts?!?!? Your boarding schools should all be ashamed. Take a second to learn the difference between you?re/your AND their/there/they?re? it?s not too difficult, lads. Yikes? no wonder why girls pine for the poor artsy types. At least they try harder!

  59. +1 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    Do all girls pine for poor artsy types ? I really think that it depends on the girl. The B&T girls are after money, even if it means a husmand/bf doesn?t have time for them. The girls who have money don?t really care for money. they want partners who have time for them. Then there are girls (about 75%) who don?t fit that stereotype. ;=) In the end, there?s somebody for everybody. You just have to look for them.

  60. -6 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    You guys are all imbeciles. Physicians rule.

  61. +4 votes + -
    MadDog Said:

    ‘Physicians Rule”? Whatever. :::Yawn::: If you want to play the validating and self-worth introspection game the only initials are ”JD”. Who do you think makes the world of Wall & Broad churn and burn? Bud Fox? GG? Please. As for you – Madam/Mister ”MD” – let?s hope your Med-Mal insurance is up to date. Easy w/ the ego. And the petty animus. Focus on the blog. Good stuff indeed, save the plagiarism. Or did ”citations to authority” escape any other corporate lawyers out there?

  62. 0 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    MadDog, Nice play on the MD and the douche above you who took it for ”Managing Director”. ”MDs” They really must be a physician. Can?t read a EKG, go on an ib blog and mettle with what they don?t understand. While it?s true that there are SOME real physician in the ib world – they?re stuck advising on biotech. Yikes. Couldn?t hack the clinical side I guess.

  63. +1 votes + -
    LaughingAtYou Said:

    It?s ironic how the same d-bags that the blog pokes fun at end up having an argument in the comments section?.

  64. 0 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    I think I enjoy reading the comments more than the actual blog! Some people are so stupid.

  65. 0 votes + -
    nox Said:

    Isn?t it a great feeling? To come here every once in a while and realize that there are stupid people out there who are taking anecdotes about finance way too seriously. Oh wait? aren?t we going to finance and consulting after graduating from Ivy League schools? Working in NYC together with most of our friends? Cranking on weekdays and living it up on the weekends? There is some sort of a perverse pleasure in knowing how different life after college is going to be. And if summer internship experiences are any indication, it is not necessarily going to be more interesting.

  66. -2 votes + -
    Brownie Said:

    I am brown and have fucked white hoes all around?the ones in London are fuckin easier..though New York?s all rite too?

  67. 0 votes + -
    Joe Said:

    Can anyone give me advice on how to become an Ibanker. I think this blog is so cool. I read it every day, I will intern for free in an IBD. Joe.

  68. +2 votes + -
    Frank Slaughtery Said:

    Joe, fist yourself 5 times a day at 15 minute intervals until you can no longer feel the pain/learn to enjoy it, then you?ll be ready.

  69. +3 votes + -
    envycity Said:

    your a fuck face!

  70. +2 votes + -
    Makin BankTill I Die Said:

    When the fuck are we getting a new post? My afternoons are becoming boring and I am tempted to read these lame message board posts.

  71. +3 votes + -
    Brown Douche Bag Said:

    Hell, this thing surely rings true. Inspite of being born and brought up in India, working in fixed income (not M&A) in London (not NY, but definitely not Dallas) makes this whole thing look a bit like my life. The bigger problem is back home in India not a lot of people understand credit derivatives, to think of it as meaningful work as well. (Yes, still all the desi girls ignore me)

  72. +3 votes + -
    sensitive Said:

    There seems to be a certain, hidden frustration with getting girls amongst most of you. This is nothing to worry about – I can assure you that with the right contemplation you can achieve self-repsect, which will lead you to respect women for what they really are – beautiful beings that enlighten our day. remember the saying ”If you can?t love yourself, you cannot love others” I study psychology and have encountered this problem in my recent study widely. Think about it and soon you shall be in a better place

  73. 0 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    It is rather funny to see these IB guys bitch and moan about getting girls. What they dont realize is that their own ego is the biggest thing working against themselves. Drop the ego?.you?ll notice the difference. And for the analyst who are going to retort to this post by telling me to douche myself: I have a dual engineering degree?work about 1/2 the hours you kids work?and still make the same/more money (startups getting bought out is a beautiful thing).

  74. 0 votes + -
    Anonymous Said:

    congrats on PME (pre-mature ejac?) you?ve hit your peak and unless you become a serial entrepreneur your lifetime income has hit a plateau. In fact, by looking at your statement i predict you?ll be a homeless tranny by the time 2010 rolls around.

  75. -2 votes + -
    Eastern European Girl Said:

    Equities in Dallas???? And it was a quick and hard fall from glory for Gopal. This was a trainee-wide event, and the absolute worst position any trainee in any division could imagine was being slotted in Equities in Dallas. No one could imagine anything less successful in their small world than an equity salesman in Dallas; the equity department was powerless, and Dallas was, well, a long way from New York.” better write down where took that qoute from. its lame how you didnt refer it

  76. 0 votes + -
    jambazi Said:

    peeps, First of all, Eastern European chic has sloppy english (Poland???)..anyways, i digress. im curious how pension and investment actuaries are viewed in your banking worlds; i can derive Ito?s lemma, B-S etc and im making 80K; am i wasting talent..

  77. +2 votes + -
    Eastern European Girl Said:

    to jambazi: i had 800 on SAT II writing and 720 on verbal. congrats on your 80K. and on your Ito?s knowledge. well I knew how to prove Pascal?s theorem in 6th grade thanks to my solid communist education. biggest mistake when i came to college in US. i didnt learn jack sh.t. except for how to get my 60K+80% bonus banking job on park ave.. and what paul stuart and t. pink stand for. which one is a bigger waste of talent?

  78. +1 votes + -
    Paul Stuart Said:

    Eastern European Girl: I got 800 SAT II Math 2C and 790 SAT II Math 1C. Do you give head on first dates?

  79. 0 votes + -
    Rich Bich Said:

    Yes they all do. That?s how Eastern European got her job that?s she?s complaining about.

  80. 0 votes + -
    Kaiz Said:

    Love the Boiler Room reference?.totally underappreciated

  81. +1 votes + -
    Most Offensive Said:

    Straight out of a cross between Monkey Business and Liar?s Poker (peeing in a bottle and equities in dallas?) Do bulge bracket banks even have equities in dallas? From what I know, there is IBD in Houston, but all capital markets are in NYC. Way to take that out of Salomon from the 80s.

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